In the Garden

Luke 22:39-53
We each have our stories. We have stories of our parents, and their parents, that we tell ourselves and our children. Sometimes as we tell these stories we might notice they are similar to classic stories of old.

The Jungian analyst Robert Johnson, in his book He , speaks of the stages of a man's life, using the Arthurian legend of Parsifal as a framework. According to Dr. Johnson, there are four stages to a man's life: youth, adult, middle age, old age. Each stage is marked by a crisis: for example, a youth may try to become a knight (or adult) too soon; or an adult may be devoured by the dragon.

In my version of my father's story, he is devoured by the dragon.

This may seem shocking, or harsh, for Padre was one of the strongest men I've known. He truly was a man who could be counted on; he was unfailingly helpful, and had a discerning “listening ear.” I flatter myself when I believe I have inherited any of these traits from him.

He went to work for Western Electric (now Lucent Technologies) in the early 1960s. He was there for over a decade – a good chunk of his life. Like many people of his generation, he believed his years of loyal service would be rewarded by loyalty from the company.

By the late 60s or early 70s, he rose to the level of supervisor – sort of middle-management. In 1972 or 73, things were getting tight for Western Electric stock holders (partly due to the break up of Bell), and management had to cut costs. Employees like Padre were faced with a choice: lay off or early retirement. Padre chose early retirement, feeling extremely betrayed.

About a year later the growth appeared on his nose. Wanda (his wife, my stepmother) strongly encouraged him to see a doctor, but he refused. He wasn't seeking another job, he wasn't doing much of anything, which also worried her. Late in the summer of '75, she moved out. At the same time, I chose to go to college.

Padre and Wanda were separated, but I've learned there was some talk of reconciliation. Sadly, in November 1975, Wanda died of a heart attack..

Padre's crisis came in his early 40s, the transition to middle age, at which time one confronts the dragon. The dragon hit Padre with everything it could. It took a lot to break him and cause him to give up on his life. But that's what he did. As Brother Dave has said, Padre's remaining 20 years was spent in a form of slow-motion suicide.

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In the first of the Sorrowful Mysteries, we see Jesus at a crisis point. A number of non-canonical accounts have seen the Agony in the Garden as an additional temptation. As the passage from Luke makes clear, Jesus does ask whether his death is really necessary. “Let this cup pass,” he prays, and according to some sources he asks as many as three times.

Jesus is fully human, as Martin Luther said, and doesn't wish to die any more than any other human.

The dragon had already thrown a lot at Jesus. It's possible Jesus had a pretty good idea how bad it would get – not just death, but an excruciating death in slow-motion.

He had the choice to call down the heavenly host. He had the choice to run away. It was probably too late to say “Sorry guys, just kidding”, but he could have tried that too. Instead, he faced the dragon.

The dragon did not prevail.

Padre walks with me to this day. I carry his weapons of integrity, honesty, and compassion as I face the little dragons of my life.

For today, the dragon will not defeat me or catch me in its jaws.