Weekend

The Christian Education conference this weekend, titled "Today's Disciples in Today's World – Oklahoma Style," was a success. I was not in best form, but (happily) the success of the conference did not depend on what form I was in.

I had been suffering insomnia for several nights, and was tired when I arrived at the conference. I think the insomnia was related to the conference in that I was excited about it, and had made several commitments related to it.

It's entirely possible that I over-committed. I don't always recognize my limits until I hit them.

I had committed to provide music for a Friday evening service, lead one of the classes, and write two articles about the conference. And, oh yeah, I was going to take photographs as well (this last did not happen).

That class was a special stressor, as I was supposed to introduce people to a book I did not see until two days before the conference.

My sleep deprivation was made even worse Friday night. My room was apparently near a malfunctioning air-handler. I was awakened at 2 a.m. by a grinding sound which seemed to go on forever. Then, even the normal sound of the system moving air seemed loud.

I was pretty much brain dead through most of the day. Unfortunately, this was the day I was supposed to give that class. I think I did OK, but I was definitely less than 100%.

At three o'clock, I was supposed to be part of a panel discussion. I was doing well to remember my name, much less what I was doing there or what I had hoped to accomplish.

Participant response was positive, both for my individual class and for the conference as a whole.

And I did get home in one piece.

Post #1442

Quote d’jour

If you know how to practice mindful walking, then you enjoy walking in the pure land of Buddha in the here and now.... When I talk to Christians I say that the Kingdom of God is now or never. You are free, and then the kingdom is there for you. If you are not free, well, the kingdom does not exist, even in the future.
— Thich Nhat Hanh, Shambhala Sun, March 2006, 101

Post #1441

Suburban Dawn

I've been passing this tree every morning, on my way to work. I've been consistently impressed by its majesty against the wakening sky.

Having some free time this morning, I walked the block or so to where this tree stands. There I was, wearing my black suede jacket, and poor-boy's cap (turned backwards, of course).

The street is not terribly busy (this was taken shortly after 7), so I was able to take a couple of shots while standing on the center line. I think this may be one of them.

I will be going to a Christian Education conference in about two hours. I mentioned this conference in passing a couple of entries back.

I've actually received a reprieve: originally, the organizers were asked to arrive by noon. Since only 3 or 4 of us could get to the conference at that hour, our arrival has been rescheduled to 2:00 p.m.

And how am I spending that found time? Surfing. Blogging. Of course.

Post #1440

Cat Friday

Post #1439

Getting to Know Your Correspondent

This quiz came via e-mail from my step-sister.

1. What time did you get up this morning? 6:00 a.m.
2. Diamonds or pearls? I don't wear either. I think a simple strand of pearls is very classy, though.
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? King Kong
4. What is your favorite TV show? Scrubs
5. What did you have for breakfast? Cereal medley
6. What is your middle name? Andrew
7. What is your favorite cuisine? American, Italian
8. What foods do you dislike? Liver, colard greens
9. What is your favorite Potato chip? Pringles
10. What is your favorite CD at the moment? Pretenders, Isle of View
11. What kind of car do you drive? Ford escort
12. What is your favorite sandwich? I've been craving P B & J
13. What characteristics do you despise? Hypocrisy
14. What is your favorite item of clothing? Vest
15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would it be? New York City
16. What color is your bathroom? Predominately white
17. Favorite brand of clothing? Land's End
18. Favorite time of day? Quittin' Time!
19. Where were you born? Oklahoma City
20. Favorite sport to watch? Basketball
21. Coke or Pepsi? I'd rather have a rootbeer or a Sprite
22. Are you a morning person or night owl? Morning
23. Do you have pets? Have you heard of a little feline named Dame Julian?
24. Any new & exciting news you'd like to share? One of my photographs was published in the state-wide church newspaper; unfortunately, I did not receive credit.
25. What did you want to be when you were little? doctor
    
26. Favorite Candy Bar? Rollo
27. What are the different jobs you have had in your life? Clerk, dog groomer, cashier, receiving room clerk, secretatry
28. Nicknames: jac, Jonah
29. Piercing: None
30. Eye color? Hazel
31. Ever been to Africa? No.
32. Ever been toilet papered? No.
33. Ever Loved someone so much it made you cry? Yes.
34. Been in a car accident? Only one - my car was totalled, but I walked away
35. Croutons or bacon bits? Croutons
36. Favorite day of the week? Saturday
37. Favorite restaurant? Olive Garden
38. Favorite flower? Jonquils
39. Favorite ice cream? Peppermint. I've also been craving a strawberry shake
40. Disney or Warner Brothers? Why? Warner Brothers - much less domesticated and sacharine than Disney.
41. Favorite fast food restaurant? Braums
42. What color is your bedroom carpet? Brown
43. How many times did you fail your driver's test? Passed it the first time.
44. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Amazon.com
45. What do you do most often when you are bored? Watch TV
46. Ford or Chevy? Ford, I guess.
47. What are you listening to right now? The computer's hum.
48. What person have you learned the most about life from? Padre
49. How many tattoos do you have? None.

Post #1438

Sleepy

I'm sleepy, so very sleepy. So perhaps I will be forgiven for posting this image (originally posted at Practicing Patience).

I've had insomnia the past few nights. I get to sleep alright, but wake up somewhere between 12:30 a.m. and 3. If I rest at all following that wake up, it's fitfully at best.

What's going on? Why is it hard for me to stay asleep?

I suspect it has something to do with all those commitments I mentioned a couple of days ago (see "Status Report", two entries down).

It seems unlikely that I'm stressed about posting 62 more entries between now and March 23, but it's possible. Even though I have a plan - post pictures, post old poems - it's a "duty" lingering at the back of my consciousness.

A word about this image: it is a collage, of sorts, made from two pictures from Entertainment Weekly. The foreground image comes from an advertisement; the background comes from a photoshoot with Cameron Diaz.

Post #1437

Ash Wednesday

"Remember, O child of God, that you are dust and to dust you shall return"

As this prayer is recited, a bit of dust is rubbed on your forehead. This dust is from palm branches that were used for the previous year's Palm Sunday. St. James' arranged with a local mortuary to burn its palm branches in the mortuary's crematorium each year. As I understand it, there was no way to guarantee that the ashes of "Uncle Joe" were not mixed with the palm ashes.

Which is appropriate, when you think about it. After all, the ashes are a memento mori (reminder of one's death).

In like manner, I have posted this picture for the past couple of Ash Wednesdays. The picture in the background is a painting by my high school friend Michael. At the time it was painted (c. 1975), this was the oldest human skull that archaeologists had discovered. Anthropologists are certain it is a woman's skull.

In the foreground is a distorted image of your correspondent. I claim kinship with that ancestor. I embrace my advancing years, with my receding hairline, and grey beard. I boldly face the one St. Francis named "Sister Death".

I remember Ash Wednesday services at St James very well. Deacon Pierce was well past retirement age, but was in good health and continued to serve the community. He would move around the altar rail, marking the foreheads of these people he had come to know and love. It was especially moving when he would come to a child. Something in his voice - or perhaps in his eyes - made it clear that he did not want to remind the child s/he would die. This is a fact of life we normally hide from our children.

I was always touched by this interaction between the generations. The child - if s/he understood any part of the ritual - most likely understood best of all that s/he was loved by this man.

We were formed from dust - from swirling motes in our parents' eyes. With age, our bodies weaken; with time, we die. More years pass, and (assuming no chemical interference) our bodies decay and return to the dust.

Remember: you are dust. To dust you shall return.

[Correction: Alexandria corrected my spelling of memento mori]

Post 1436

Beauty Salon

The sign reads "Le'Ora's Beauty Salon". This is a picture I had orinally posted on my temporary Typepad site; not sure many people saw it (as no one commented on it), so it feels safe to post here.

And include in the count-down to the anniversary.
Post #1435

Status Report

This is post number 1434. I only have sixty-six entries to go to hit 1500. Not counting today, there are 23 days until this blog's anniversary.

Can I post almost 3 entries per day?

As if that's not challenging enough, I've volunteered to pick up a couple of entries for the Ordinary Time book. Right - just when I should be focusing on writing for this venue, I'm writing for another one, which won't be seen until late this year.

But wait, there's more!

I'll be out of town this Friday and Saturday for an Education Conference. Incidentally, I'll be providing music for a service Friday evening.

AND ... I've been asked to write an article on this conference, which will likely be published locally (in state) and regionally.

And, oh yeah, I've got that whole nine to five thing going on, too.

I'm not complaining about any of this - just acknowledging my tendency to over-commit, at times.

Maybe it's time I start "padding" with more photographs. Transcribe one or two poems from my youth.

Surely, Ms. DJ is so special she deserves more than one photo per week (she's normally featured on "Cat Friday"). I've got a few photographs and digital art that I posted elsewhere that many of you may not have seen already.

Yep. Time to pull out the big guns.

Monday Prayer

Before I was formed
Before my eyes opened
Before my hands could grasp
Before I had a name
Before I was dust
You knew me

From the dust you formed me
From the void you named me
You knew me
You knit me

Open my eyes this day
Open my heart
To see you in all things,
all lives, all hearts;
Teach me to greet Your face
in every face I meet.
Teach me to open my hands
to serve You through others.
Teach me to open my hands
to reach for You alone.

This I ask in your Holy Name.
Amen.

Post #1433 (for Lea)

Definitions

Mike led me to this.
'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Jonah [noun]

An alien

I also entered my birth name, which was defined as "Smelling like an onion at times."

Why should I have all the fun -

Dame Julian [noun]

A poltergeist sent back in time to change the course of history forever

Scary how accurate this thing is!

Post #1432

The Booksale

The annual "Friend of the Library Sale" is this weekend. For a book lover, this event is somewhere between nirvana and an opium den.

It's been a long time since I've gone. In fact, it was when I was living in Norman and Dr. Omed was living in a hovel in OKC. I think. We went together.

I remembered it as being a pleasant experience, and have been wanting to go again.

I forgot one itsy bitsy detail: it would be crowded.

Very crowded.

And I don't like crowds.

I'm not agoraphobic, necessarily (lit., fear of the market place). I just have an overly-well defined sense of personal space, and it seems exceptionally easy for it to feel invaded.

And since the primary reality I know is my perception of reality, I assume other folk have the same amount of personal space. And I try to respect it. Golden rule and all that, you know.

So, now and again, there'd be a group of people at each of the aisle, such that I would have to squeeze through them to get out. I'd often feel trapped.

Or I'd have to squeeze in to get a decent squinty look at the titles.

I lasted for about 45 minutes before the anxiety over-came my biblophilia (love of books).

So - what did I get? Six books in all - three hardbacks and three paperbacks.

1. Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?
2. Rilke, Duino Elegies, trans. by Leishman & Spender
3. Thinking Passover by Rabbi Ben Kamin
4. And Still the Rivers Run by Angie Debo
5. Alan Watts' The Way of Zen; and
6. Skinny Dip by Carl Hiaasen.

I shared this list with Spideygirl earlier this evening, and she commented that I have very eclectic tastes.

Well, let's see - Jewish, Native American, Zen, a book of poetry, and a two light books.

Seems normal to me. Let's take the oddest ones in order:

1. Jewish
Our family joined the Episcopal Church when Padre remarried, around 1966 or 67. I was 12 or 13. We eventually joined St. John's, where Fr. Connolly (the beloved) was rector. It was the 2nd or 3rd year we were there that the church held a seder meal during Holy Week.

That's probably when I had the teen-age version of a Western satori: Jesus was Jewish.

Mind you, this was before Bishop Spong. Bishop Pike, of California, had been saying similar things, but most people had dismissed him as crazy by then.

So, I became very interested in Jewish thought. Padre was acquainted with the Rabbi, and got me a booklet about Jewish festivals.

I've been reading Jewish texts ever since. I love the Rabbi Small mysteries, I love Elie Wiesel's books (especially Souls on Fire).

2. Native American
The word "Oklahoma" means something like "land of the red man". We can't quite escape the fact that this state served as an early version of Guatanamo back in the 1800s. Nor can we escape the treaty which promised the territory to folk we forcibly relocated here "so long as the grass grows and the rivers flow".

By the late 1800s, folk decided us white folk needed that grass and those rivers more than the red folk, and we boomed in.

Angie Debo, one of the first female historians, wrote the seminal text on this betrayal. She was also born in Oklahoma.

Obviously, I know the general story. I think it's past time for me to learn the rest.

3. Zen Buddism
This also began when I was a teenager. The local PBS station aired a program with Alan Watts titled, "Conversation With Myself". All it was, was Watts talking about Zen. For thirty minutes.

I was enraptured.

Sometime after that, I bought his book of essays, This Is It. In it was an essay about the Beats (Watts did not care for their interpretation of Zen or Buddhism). Which got me to reading Kerouac.

See how my mind works?

I've read several of Watts' other books on Zen. I especially like his last book, Tao: The Watercourse Way.

His work has inspired a life-long interest in Zen and Buddhism.

---

Post #1431

Happy Bl-irthday, Rev. Stacey

Or Blog Day, as we Southerners call it.

I've never met Stacey. She lives (and preaches) in a small town in New York. I live in a "big" city.

OKC is big? Well, it's all relative.

Yet, we are part of a community. Actually, multiple communitites.

We're both members of the RevGalBlogPal ring (link is WAAAAY down on the left). We are also frequent visitor's in the RLP chatroom.

I know less about her denomination (Reformed Church USA) than she knows about mine (Episcopal). Yet, we've found many things in common.

Like, for example, I'm cool with women ministers.

We're both on the "liberal" end of the religious spectrum. Neither of us would bar homosexuals from the ministry, for example.

We might disagree about other things - whether the resurrection was a physical, literal event for example. But such things are beside the point, as far as I'm concerned.

The point is relationships. Face to face relationships are the ideal, of course. But it's nice to have "virtual" relationships as well. Her witness encourages me.

She's been recording her experience as a new minister. In fact, she recently started her second year at her church. Her experience is challenging, and trying, and - I believe - rewarding.

The new title of her web-log is "The Almond Branch". It's the first one in the roll to your left. I strongly encourage you to check it out!

Post #1430

Cat Friday

This is Simba. I visited Simba last weekend, when I braved icy roads to visit his human companion, Elsie.

I must admit that I looked forward to seeing Simba again, too.

I owe him a debt of gratitude, for he convinced Elsie that I was an OK guy. She and I sat on her couch - this is when she lived 90 minutes south of here. Simba was a few feet away, and I clicked for him.

Simba came to the couch, got in my lap, and started purring. According to Elsie, he rarely reacted so positively to men. This planted the idea that I was a decent fellow. If Simba had been Jewish, instead of Siamese, he might have said I was a true mensch.

Simba is unique among Siamese of my acquaintance, in that he doesn't talk much. DJ, our mutual feline friend, is chattier than Simba. Elsie told me he once got caught in a closet, and she didn't know about it because he didn't cry out.

Anyone who has ever spent more than 5 minutes in a room with a Siamese cat know this is highly unusual.

Anyway, here's to you Simba! Have some catnip on me!

Status Report

This is entry number 1428. Those of you with good memories will recall that I set myself the goal of having entry number 1500 appear on my blog anniversary - March 23rd. I began this web-log on that date in 2003.

It's hard to believe that I have posted 1427 entries in three years. Assuming each of those years had 365 days, that represents an average of a little less than 1.5 entries per day. March 23, 2006, is only 28 days away ("February is a son of a gun"). This means I need to post a little over 2.5 entries per day.

It's a bold goal, but one needs bold goals if one ever hopes to achieve anything worthy of note. Besides, I can always "pad" with Photoshop art, pictures of my cat, poetic fragments, and meta-self-reflective entries such as this one.

It's interesting how folk respond to this space. In Wednesday's RevGal round-up, Will Smama mentions that she is intimidated by my blog. In a friendly comment-interchange (which you will see toward the bottom of the "round-up"), she admits she is intimidated by the sheer volume of my verbiage.

Not necessarily the quality. I can understand how the sight of all those words marching down the screen would be a little intimidating.

Will Smama, may I introduce you to Meg? She is even more verbose than I am, and posts practically every day.

Talk about overwhelming....

On the other hand, Christine Hamm includes me on a long list of poets who can kick her fanny. At first, I thought the verb might be "kiss", but it is "kick".

Ms. Hamm has been posting since 2002, so she has me beat in longevity. And she has posted more poems per week than I have lately.

About her list of "poets who can kick my ass" - as a list of blogging poets, it's almost as inclusive and extensive as Ron Silliman's. Still, I'm mighty pleased to be included in such distinguished company.

Originally, I was using this space to vent my spleen toward USA, Inc. (D*ck Cheney, CEO). Then, when I rediscovered a poetic voice, I was posting reputed poems every day.

I've used this space for personal reflections, theological musings, and obsessive pictures of my feline companion.

I seem to lack the discipline to focus on one thing. Which I hope makes this an interesting place to visit. Rather than a somewhat disjointed one.

Idée d'jour

A man needs a little madness, or else he never dares cut the rope and be free.
— Nikos Kazantzakis, writer (1883-1957)
I remember a variation of this line from the film version of Zorba the Greek. Best Anthony Quinn movie ever.

How Can I Keep From Singing

My life flows in on endless song
above Earth's lamentation
I hear the real tho' far-off hymn
that hails a new creation.
No storm can shake my inmost calm
while to that rock I'm clinging;
Since Love is Lord of Heaven and Earth,
How can I keep from singing?

What though the tempest loudly roars,
I hear the truth it liveth;
What though the darkness round me close,
songs in the night it giveth.
Through all the tumult & the strife,
I hear the music ringing.
It sounds an echo in my soul -
How can I keep from singing?

When tyrants tremble, sick with fear,
their final death knells ringing;
When Friends rejoice, both far & near,
How can I keep from singing?
In prison cell or dungeon vile,
our thoughts to them are winging.
When Friends by shame are undefiled,
How can I keep from singing?
© 1957, Sanga Music Inc.

---

I originally posted this Saturday, Feb. 18, and Blogger apparantly ate it. This is my response to Rev. Mommy's question, "How do you express the hope for the New Jerusalem?" [I paraphrase]. She expresses her hope through the William Blake poem of the same name, linked above.

This is my favorite song. I'm told it's Sparks', as well. There are a number of excellent recordings of it; I think my introduction was through Pete Seeger's.

According to the Rise Up Singing collection (© 1988), "This is an old Quaker hymn that dates back to pre-Civil War North Carolina, when Friends there suffered persecution for their opposition to slavery."

This is what gives me hope. Individuals may be cruel, venal, and so on - the "Children of Night". They are outnumbered by the "Children of Light". Humanity, as a whole, tends toward the positive. The movement is frustratingly slow, but it does occur.

Slavery is no more in the U.S. Racism persists, but great strides have been made there as well.

Just as these evils were eventually overcome, the present unpleasantness will come to an end in time. Already the witnesses against America's Iraq folly are increasing - the Christian Peacekeeper Teams being the most notable.

I put my "arrows of desire" in my quiver. I pledge myself to the "Lord of Love". I shall strive this day to be an agent of hope.

A Day Like Today

A day like today
when the hours have
exhausted their options;

A day like today
tempts the covers
to stay over your head.

A day like today
is frozen; breath freezes
on your words,
your words freeze
in your mouth.

When you face a day like today,
you might as well pack your tent.

When you meet a day like today,
you best turn around
and walk the other way.

A day like today
has your number, bub.
It's going to hunt you down
like a squirrel digging
after forgotten nuts.

You never want to forget
a day like today.
It's a passionate heartache
that has bought the last ticket
out of the precincts
of a day like today.

But that's alright,
you want to say,
it's still alright
cause a day like today
is still better than
a day like yesterday.

Haried Meme

[For some reason, every time I try to post this entry it disappears two days later. This is my third attempt.]
A number of people on the RevGalBlogPal ring have been doing the latest craze - the Johai Window, and it's dark cousin, the Nohari Window.

I've resisted as long as possible, until visiting with Sparks (in the RLP chatroom) convinced me the exercise has some value.

Plus, indulging in this meme gets me that much closer to achieving my goal of having entry #1,500 appear on March 23. I've been posting to this blog since that date in 2003. In the left side-bar, you may view what I consider to be the "best" entries of the first two years. Or, if you have considerable time to kill, you may read all the entries since 2003, week by week.

May the BlogGod have mercy on your immortal soul should you choose that latter option.

Koan d'jour

How many octaves does thunder have?
— Gretel Ehrilich, "What Is the Worth of the Wind River Mountains?", Shambhala Sun, March 2006, 104